I am so excited! How in the world did I even get to this place??
It is truly unbelievable when I sit and think about where the Lord has me today.
After ten a half months, the Lord has placed something completely unexpected on my heart for how I am to make a difference in this world and bring His Kingdom.
I expected to fall in love with a certain region of the world, or a certain culture. I expected to have God confirm that He was calling me to long-term international work.
Instead the Lord has put possible callings on my heart to pray into that I never thought would be there.
Sometimes God downloads His vision for our life completely, sometimes He does it bit by bit – I’ll share the bits He has downloaded so far..
I still feel called to be heavily involved in the international arena, but I no longer feel called to live abroad full time. Instead, God is calling me strongly back to America.
I have encountered so many needs this year, and it can be a struggle at times to not feel completely overwhelmed and helpless. Of course I want to change things and help people, in social welfare and justice programs and more importantly in sharing with them the Gospel of Christ, but the question is how? For me, personally, what is God’s dream for my life in how He wants to use me to address these flagrant needs around His world.
So many amazing options exist, that incredible men and women of God have devoted their lives to. Feeding programs, providing healthcare, social justice, love through running orphanages, door to door evangelism, and the list goes on and on.
None of these individual endeavors have captured my heart – which has only pushed me deeper in prayer throughout this year.
I believe that God is calling me to something bigger. Not better - just broader. That He is calling me back to America, to pursue, utilize, and steward all the privileges and opportunities being an American citizen provides. Through America, God will use me to bring the most change in the world and bring His Kingdom to the most places and people. (see my "These Colors Don't Run" blog: http://jasonhilborn.theworldrace.org/?filename=these-colors-dont-run)
Specifically, I believe that God is calling me to Washington DC some time in the near future, to be an influence on the influencers there; and even more crazy – to possibly get involved in government!
Government is something I have never, ever, had any interest in actually getting directly involved in. But as I have seen all of these needs, and spent time in thought and pray, going down the line to root causes and how to fix them, for me everything always comes back to the government.
If the government can be transformed for Christ, the entire nation can be transformed, not only in their physical well-being, but also in the well-being of their hearts.
This is a big reason why I feel so heavily called to Washington DC. This fall, I will be re-taking the LSAT and reapplying to law schools, with the intention of gaining entrance to one of the DC schools.
Before heading down the DC/America route, God has made it clear that there is more of Him to be had, higher levels of spiritual growth and maturity to reach, and places to go with Him; all of which will be found at G42.
It is so hard to describe my excitement for G42. I am going to enter G42 like a sponge, jumping in with both feet, to absorb and glean as much as I can spiritually from the staff and teachers there. I will be under the discipleship and apprenticeship of the heads of huge international non-profit organizations and ministries, being pushed into deeper levels of intimacy with God, and will leave with an incredible network of Christian support around the world.
As an added bonus, I will also receive some training in running an international non-profit organization, which is very convenient as God has been putting an idea for a non-profit on my mind for a while now. I will be able to pursue that, but my overall pursuit will still be for the more of God that will come by being a part of the discipleship and community that makes up G42.
That’s where I’m at in dreaming with God. In the end, The Holy Spirit could completely change the direction of my life yet again while I am at G42, which I am fully open to. Someone once told me that, “the last word is always the last word until God gives you a new word.” So for now – that is what He has given me, and that is what I will be pursuing.
I head off to G42 in January of 2013.
I’ll be coming home to Orlando, FL mid-June, praying and trusting the Lord for favor in finding a job to support myself for the rest of summer and the fall; as well as for the strength to study for the LSAT while having a full-time job.
I am completely trusting God in this, knowing that He is calling me to G42.
In this, I would like to invite you to become a part of the bigger picture of my life as I continue to pursue God’s calling. G42 is not just about the 6 months I will spend there, it is about the work the Lord has for me after the 6 months during the rest of my life, and the spiritual equipping at G42 I will receive to complete it.
Please pray and seek the Lord about supporting me financially. I need to raise $6500 to attend the academy; this will provide me with tuition, a place to live, and food for 6 months. ANY amount helps so much. Donations can be given as one-time gifts or monthly.
If you would like to support me financially, you may go to this site, http://www.g42leadershipacademy.org/donate, after you fill out your bank account/credit card information, there will be a space for you to fill in my name under “intern’s name”. Or if you would prefer, you can send a check to:
G42
P.O. Box 130611
Houston, TX 77219-0611
Please make checks payable to "G42", and be sure to write my name on the memo line.
G42 is registered with the Internal Revenue Service as a 501(c)(3) non-profit organization, and donors will receive a receipt for their gifts.
Above all, please spend time in prayer for me. I have seen first hand this year the miraculous power of prayer, so please pray for me, for the finances to come in, for a job this fall, for continued trust and dependence upon God and the peace that brings, and, as always, simply for more of Him.
It’s gonna be so wild, its gonna be so great, it’s gonna be filled with so much more of Him.
It is often the little moments in life that are so convicting.
Sunday morning, I woke up fairly early, with two thoughts on my mind: what I was going to speak about at church, and more pressing at the moment, the fact that I needed to go to the bathroom.
I have been sleeping in an orphanage so far this month, so I woke up, and walked over to the bathroom, it was locked, with no one in it – someone had just been playing with the lock.
Immediately frustrated, I turned around and considered my alternatives. There have been people this year who have been forced to use a water bottle, but I wasn’t about to stoop that low quite yet, especially since someone could walk in at any time.
I decided I would try outside behind the children’s home, I walked outside and was just about to relieve myself when one of the kids came walking around the corner to wash something. Again frustrated and in pain at this point, I turned to walk back inside. When the boy saw me, with the biggest smile you can imagine he turned to me and and said, “Why are you not smiling today!?”
He had me. I could not think of one reason why I was not smiling.
I have been given so many unbelievable blessings in my life to smile about. God has been answering prayers and giving me things that I haven’t even asked for, and through that showing me I need to ask bigger, dream bigger, and pray bigger.
I can’t let the little things of this world cause me any frustration, because the fact is I don’t even belong to this world. I belong to heaven.
The more I focus on the unseen and on eternal things, the more I can bring heaven to this earth, and the less the things of this earth matter. This changes the priorities in your life DRAMATICALLY.
When I focus on the heavenly, there is no reason why I shouldn’t be smiling at all times.
I have been living in a mountainous tropical paradise this past week. I didn’t think those two adjectives could be used together, but visit the town of Malaybalay, in Mindanao in the Philippines, and you will know what I mean.
3 hours by van into the mountains of Mindanao, there exists a children’s home, an amazing place where kids with no families receive unending amounts of love. The land the orphanage is on is also home to many outreach camps throughout the year, a soccer field, volleyball court, basketball court and church.
The name of the church is Mt. Moriah, which is the mountain that Abraham took his son Isaac too. The church was named after it to symbolize full-out faith and obedience to God’s calling.
A huge tournament was held here this past week, known as the first annual “Sportsfest.” Teams from the local town participated, with The Gospel being shared to start off the event.
I wake up each morning, and walk out of my room to grab a cup of coffee. I am living/sleeping in the actual orphanage, so I emerge to the shouts of “koo yah!!” (meaning uncle) with at least 4-8 smiling faces all running towards me for a hug. The absolute best way to start each day, and makes me excited to be a dad some day. I grab my cup of coffee and head back into my room for some sweet time worshipping and praying.
Then the day begins, full of playing sports, watching sports, fellowship, and forming relationships with people, and talking about having a relationship with God. After dinner I am more than ready to get some sleep. It has been an awesome time so far; perfect way to spend the first full week of my last month.
The more: a phrase that started this journey, remains as I end it, and is all the more present as I start to begin a new season of life.
Month 9 in Malaysia, God absolutely rocked my world, in more ways than one too.
On a bus ride from Penang to Kuala Lumpur, it hit me that I couldn’t remember the last time I had really gone deep in prayer about my future. For months I had been concentrating and focusing my prayers on so many other things, placing priority to those things over myself and my future, and not bothering to pray any more about my future since I already had made plans for after the Race to move up to Virginia to attend William & Mary for law school.
I began asking the Lord to speak to me about my future, and if He still in fact had William & Mary for me.
The first thing that came to me was the question, “is law school big enough?” “Is moving up to Virginia and going to William & Mary big enough for me in this next season or am I settling?” “Is it really tapping into the more of what God has for me and all that He wants to use me to do for His Kingdom?”
Month 4 in Nepal, one of our alumni squad leaders mentioned to me about a leadership academy called G42. On the surface I dismissed it immediately, as “leadership academy” just sounded like an excuse to have someone pay money to take classes to learn things that they could learn in the real world without schooling.
Once again, just like when I first checked out The World Race website, all of the thoughts, dreams, and desires in my mind were suddenly appearing in front of me, written out onto a website.
G42 is a network of Christ-followers with the mission to plant churches, businesses, and ministries to spread the Kingdom of God around the world – to inspire and develop leaders who are passionate about giving their lives to the Message of Christ.
The teachers, leaders, and staff at G42 are all heads of large organizations around the world, who firmly believe that part of their calling in life is to impart everything they have learned spiritually throughout their lives to the next generation.
With much regret, I again dismissed it, thinking that if I weren’t going to law school, it would be absolutely perfect. Everything for law school was set, I had already put in tons of effort, my seat to William & Mary was deferred, I was good to go with no worries, I wasn’t going to give that up. I put G42 in the back of my mind and refused to contemplate it further, definitely refused to pray about it.
G42 came flooding to the front of my mind as soon as I began asking The Lord if William & Mary was still what He had for me. Was it even possible it wasn’t? Could G42 really be the next step for me? I knew I had to get on my face and pray.
The next week was agonizing, but so good at the same time. I was thankful if I fell asleep before 5am, laying on the floor that was my bed each night in deep thought and prayer. The Holy Spirit began putting more questions on my heart, such as, “Where is the more of God to be found for you in the next step?”
It soon began to get clear. “The more” of God is something I had been going after this whole year, and the more of Him for me to find in the next season of my life was going to be found at G42, under the discipleship of the leaders there.
I knew I could still choose to go to William & Mary, and that it would be good, that God would use me for amazing things there, and use my education at William & Mary for His Kingdom. However, looking at the whole picture of my life, G42 sets me up to be used by God for His Kingdom to the fullest potential. It was clear what I had to do. Instantly I was filled with so much peace, which I know was straight from God.
I contacted my parents, a terrifying endeavor but I wanted to include them in the process so they could be praying for me, and sent in an application for G42.
A week or two into Month 10 in Cambodia, God soon began putting something more on my heart. I tried fighting it, arguing against it logically, attempting to justify myself that I had already stepped out in faith enough, but I couldn’t ignore it, and knew what He was telling me to do.
Before I was to run forward on this new path of life, I needed to completely release my old one. I needed to withdraw from William & Mary, before hearing back from G42.
The Lord wanted me to let go of myself, release MY plans for my life, and completely fall into His plans. To clear everything out of my life from my past, so that moving forward, everything in it is entirely from Him.
I had to pray about not necessarily if the Lord was calling me to G42, but rather, if he was calling me to not attend William & Mary. The past few months, God has continued to confirm the fact that He is calling me to Washington DC some day, and as I prayed into W&M, I knew that despite my love for W&M, it’s programs and faculty, if I was ever going to attend law school, it would be in DC.
I went to my computer, started typing, said a prayer, and clicked my mouse pad – officially withdrawing my seat from William & Mary’s incoming law class of 2015.
For so long I had been on this one track, I was never pressured to be on it, I put myself on it. Now that I have taken myself off of it, my perspective has changed and I now see the whole world and my future in a different light.
I am now free, and experiencing more peace in my life than I have ever felt. I am dangling on a string in this world, attached to only God, truly ready to go wherever He leads me and wherever He calls me.
I can realistically, literally, do anything I want, wherever The Holy Spirit leads me, which could very well be back onto the same track, but with a different vision and purpose.
If I am not accepted to G42, I know that I know that I know that the Lord has something even better for me.
The Psalms have spoken so loudly to me this year, I’ve read them straight through more than once, and now as I am in this place of waiting to see where God has me, I love meditating on Psalm 31 and Psalm 44.
Psalm 31:3-4 “For You are my rock and my fortress; Therefore, for Your name’s sake, Lead me and guide me… for You are my strength, into Your hand I commit my spirit.”
Psalm 44:3 “For they did not gain possession of the land by their own sword, Nor did their own arm save them; But it was Your right hand, Your arm, and the light of Your countenance, Because You favored them.”
There is no battle to be won, no victory to be had, without God. I am nothing without Him.
I do have Him, and now, truly, only Him and Him alone. He is so good.
Psalm 52:8-9 “But I am like a green olive tree in the house of God; I trust in the mercy of God forever and ever. I will praise You forever, Because You have done it; And in the presence of Your saints, I will wait on Your name, for it is good.”
Psalm 29:11 “The Lord will bless His people with peace.”
Month 10 has ended - probably the roughest month physically. Incredibly hot, and any attempts to clean all the sweat off your buddy had to be done with muddy water used to quench the thirst of the farm animals. It hit me how I now react so different to some situations, and I began reflecting on the different reactions by a World Racer between Month 1 and Month 10 to the same situation. Here are a few examples..
Scenario: In a train station, have a few hours to kill, need a place to sit down, put down your bags, and walk around
Month 1 Racer: “this is a good place, well lit up, we’ll put the bags here, you be a lookout on the left, you be a lookout on the right, everyone circle around the bags, pay attention to anyone who looks suspicious.”
Month 10 Racer: “this looks like a good place, because its right where I happen to be standing, I’ll just throw my bag down here and go find food, if anyone wants to run off with a 50 pound bag, more power to em”
Scenario: Laying down in bed, trying to fall asleep, and you feel a bug crawling on your leg
Month 1 Racer: “Ah! What is that!? Where is my headlamp? I need to find this bug and kill it.. oh that’s an interesting color spider, alright good now its dead and I can fall asleep.”
Month 10 Racer: “Seriously this bug better stop crawling on me, it’s tickling me I can’t fall asleep, I’ll just brush it off with my other leg… crawling on me again? Ahhh im trying to fall asleep get off!!... Alright last straw now I’m going to have to find you and kill you so you stop tickling me and I can fall asleep”
Scenario: Shampoo/washing your hair
Month 1 Racer: “These 3 bottles of head n shoulders should last me a while, I’ll wash my hair every day to make sure I don’t get dandruff”
Month 10 Racer: “Alright, I’ve got half of a travel size bottle of head n shoulders left, if I wash my hair only a few times the next couple weeks, it will last right up until travel day and then I not only wont have to buy new shampoo, but my bag will be lighter for the flight.”
Scenario: Out n about in a city, and you spy a bathroom
Month 1 Racer: “Eh, I don’t really have to go the bathroom, I’ll just wait”
Month 10 Racer: “Oh sweet an actual bathroom! Who knows the next time I will see one today, and I’d rather not get stuck on a mini van and have to go, I’ll definitely go now..” (Same thought process will occur when you see the next bathroom 30 minutes later..)
Scenario: General hygiene, example: clean hands
Month 1 Racer: “Hey can you pass over your hand sanitizer, I just shook hands with a local, don’t want to catch anything.”
Month 10 Racer: “I think I last washed my hands back in month 5 that one time I used the squatty potty and things got crazy in there..”
Scenario: First arriving in a major city, deciding what to do/where to go
Month 1 Racer: “Oh this city is beautiful, let’s go see the sights, check things out, get a feel for the culture..”
Month 10 Racer: “Food. Food. Where is the food? Give me food and air conditioning.”
Scenario: Travel day, complicated connections, can’t read any of the signs, no idea where you are going/what to do
Month 1 Racer: “we’re never going to make it! What do we do!? This is horrible, we are so lost right now”
Month 10 Racer: “Eh, whatever – God will work something out.”
Scenario: Just arrive at ministry site; time to get sleeping arrangements settled
Month 1 Racer: “Alrighty, I’ll blow up my sleeping pad and lay it here, I can put a sheet over it and lay on the sheet, then lay on top of my sleeping bag too. Then I’ll blow up my pillow and I will be all set.”
Month 10 Racer: “Hmm, my sleeping pad doesn’t work anymore, but I’ll still lay it out because it’s better than nothing. I lost my sheet back in month 3, so I can lay down a few t-shirts to sleep on top of, and I misplaced my pillow month 5 so I’ll just roll up my boxers and use them as a pillow. Perfect.”
Oh how the times have changed. It’s been a goooooood year.
Oh what a year it was. As I sit in this leaky hut during a thunderstorm in the middle of nowhere Cambodia, I am taken back to the spring of 2011, to when time after time I saw God show up in my life through the actions of many of you. Your financial support and prayers are what began this journey over a year ago, and in these past 10 months have provided people from all walks around the world with the love of Christ and an opportunity to begin a personal relationship with Him.
Here is a country by country summary of how YOU brought the Kingdom of Christ to the nations, along with a link to a blog post from each location..
Amidst beautiful rolling hills in the former bread-basket of The Soviet Union, there lies a small, one street town called Cornesti. Here, Pastor Vitali and his church are a light in a dark, post-communist country. You helped Pastor Vitali build a greenhouse, as part of an ongoing desire to one day become a self-sustaining ministry. You ministered to street orphans, and evangelized house to house throughout the village, spreading the good news of The Gospel. Your love penetrated that cold town.
You partnered with the only protestant church in the area, one that over the years continues to thrive and grow despite persecution and violence from the Eastern Orthodox Church. A church community that truly functions as a family, you were able to step in alongside of them, ministering to children, finishing the construction of their new church building, and witnessing of the glory of God in neighboring villages who had never heard of Jesus Christ.
An absolutely crazy month, full of the presence of The Holy Spirit. In hot and sweaty door to door village evangelism 10 hours a day, the Lord used you to bring miracles of healing, deliverances, and hundreds of souls into His Kingdom. PRAISE HIM!
In a wild month spread out all over a country containing one of God’s most majestic creations, God used you in many ways to show love to children in teaching them English and about Jesus Christ, spread His Gospel to different villages, and reveal more of Himself in youth conferences and church meetings.
Amidst a people still suffering from political violence of 2007, and current terrorist attacks from radicals in Somalia, God used you as a light within Internationally Displaced Persons camps, small villages, hospitals and prisons. Many people were able to hear about how to have a relationship with God and the hope and joy that brings despite earthly circumstances.
A nation experiencing radical healing and reconciliation from the genocide in the ‘90s, The Lord used you to spread His Gospel and revelations in preaching in churches, banks, markets, and radio shows all over the city of Kigali.
A beautiful country, God used you to again show more of His love in teaching the next generation of children a variety of subjects in school, spreading His Gospel throughout villages, and discipling and training young Christians in different villages in their faith.
In a country so desperately in need of the experience of the love and forgiveness of Christ, you were used to help YWAM of Thailand in their self-sustaining efforts by providing free labor on their goat/rubber/tapioca farm. YWAM Thailand is a continual source of light in the darkness through many different types of ministry throughout Bangkok, Chang Mai, and many other cities of Thailand.
A hidden jewel of Southeast Asia, both in aesthetic qualities as well as evangelism and ministry opportunities. The Lord used you to raise money to provide heart surgeries to those desperately in need yet unable to afford the procedure. You were also used to evangelize to and love on the homeless of the streets of Penang, and the hospital patients of Kuala Lumpur.
The hottest month of the year, God used you to teach and show His love to young boys who had been rescued from the streets and suffered years of drug and sexual abuse. You also helped construct a building to be used to draw in more youth throughout a local village, exposing them to The Gospel as well as providing a place of love where they can grow in their faith.
Mindanao/Manila, Philippines:
It's not quite over yet, and in the final chapter of the year, the Lord will use you again as a vessel of his love and affections to meet the needs of abandoned children and the impoverished.
Those are some of the ways in each nation that the Lord used you for His Kingdom. He also used you to dramatically change my life – to push me into closer dependency on Him and closer intimacy with Him. I will be forever thankful.
This journey in my life that you helped get started is only just beginning, and stay tuned for an update on how God completely changed my life plans, at least as far as my next step is concerned. But for now, again, thank you.
Here is a song by the youth of a chuch we partnered with in Kuala Lumpur. Their words express my heart.
We’ve officially made it to Cambodia for month 10. So far this month I have been with Team Deepest Roots about an hour outside of Phnom Penh in Takeo, in the middle of nowhere on a farm. We are partnering with Teen Challenge this month, the farm is home to about 20 boys from 8 years old to late teens, who have been rescued from the streets after suffering years of drug and sexual abuse.
The living conditions are rough, from the hours of 1 to 3 it’s pretty much impossible to move and even think clearly because the heat is simply overwhelming and inescapable, but it has been one of my favorite ministries so far this year.
These boys are yearning for love, for attention, to figure out what it means to grow up into a man. When I first arrived, I showed the boys some basketball dribbling moves and they ate it up, afterwards we went and played some volleyball.
It kills me to meet these 10,11, and 12 year olds who have never had a father show them the proper way to throw a ball. It makes me so unbelievably thankful for the childhood I hide and the father I had, and at the same time makes me want to give back to these kids as much as I can. The language barrier is very difficult; so most love can only be shown in action – but who needs to speak to play sports together?
The place here is so full of love. Never once have I seen any of the boys fighting with one another, which in any community of boys/men that’s a pretty common occurrence. I am so thankful for organizations like Teen Challenge and how the Lord is using them to completely change these boys lives.
All of Cambodia has been enjoying a few days off to celebrate their new year, but starting tomorrow we will be teaching in the classrooms here all day. I’m excited to get to pour into these boys all that the Lord enables me.
You gotta want it. BAD. You don’t just wake up one day, walk out onto the field, and win a championship. It takes blood, sweat, tears, time, diligence; of breaking yourself down and building yourself back up in such a way - that when it comes time for that last second shot, that game winning tackle, or the walk-off homer – you’re ready.
If you want more of God, which He freely offers, you have to seek after it, with all you have, through breaking point after breaking point.
Jeremiah 29:13, “You will seek me and find me WHEN YOU SEEK ME WITH ALL YOUR HEART.”
I’m not talking about salvation, I’m talking about living the Christian life of sanctification, of becoming more Christ-like, and hearing His voice more and more and obeying the leadings of The Holy Spirit; of going deeper in your relationship with your Father in Heaven and finding more of God. Do you want that? DO YOU!? I do.
If you do, it’s gonna’ cost you. Have you stepped out in faith, to start finding more of God and what He has for you on this earth, only to find pain? GOOD.
We have to get broken down. Broken down of things in our lives we use as crutches. Broken down from what we believe to be our own gifts and strengths, and realize that we have nothing. NOTHING EXCEPT HIM.
Psalm 37:16, "A mighty man is not delivered by great strength."
This year has been tough, I’ve been broken, I’ve bled, shed tears, felt alone. But it has been so AMAZING, because in these past 9 months, I have found more of Him, which is a huge reason I set out on this journey. God is my rock and my foundation. He is all I need and all I will ever need on this earth.
Psalm 62:2, "He only is my rock and my salvation. He is my defense; I shall not be greatly moved."
The good news is, there is still more. There is always MORE. And I am going to keep fighting for Him with all I have. It might hurt a little, but that is to be expected. We have to BREAK to BUILD. 1 Peter 4:12, “Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you.”
So keep let’s keep fighting together! There is so much more to be had RIGHT NOW on this earth. We aren’t just here to have our salvation guaranteed and chill out and wait to die. We aren’t here just to find a well paying job, a good wife/husband, and a nice family. (*although God absolutely blesses us with those things*) There is more of God to be had right here right now.
Throughout First and Second Chronicles, whenever the Kings would die, the Scriptures are make a point to mention where they are buried. Those who lived their lives in defiance of God were not even buried, those who followed God for the most part were buried in the City of David, and those who followed God full-out with their whole hearts were buried in the most pristine places within in the City of David. THAT is where I plane to be buried, I pray you will be joining me there, but we’re all gonna have to break to get there.
The second half of Malaysia, I was in Kuala Lumpur with Team Red Thread. While there, through conversations with the pastors we were with, as well as direct experience, I was further exposed to the strict laws of the religions in Malaysia.
One day, we went to a hospital downtown, fully loaded with roses, evangelism tracts, and invitations to an Easter service.
We went bed to bed, talking with people where we could, offering them love in whatever ways possible, and asking them if we could pray for them, sometimes we even got the chance to share the Gospel with them. We had to be very careful, as at any time someone could call the authorities on us, so we had to be sure that the person we were talking with either asked us to hear more about how they could have a relationship with God or about our own personal stories.
Before a couple of hours, we were being escorted out by the police. Thankfully just out to the parking lot, not to jail, and the church we were with did not get into any trouble either.
The restrictions on religion were absolutely infuriating to me and hard for me to stomach. I was thankful that I was still able to participate in evangelism throughout the month, as to put it in one pastor we worked with’s words, “someones gotta do it!” I agree.
The name of God can receive immense amounts of glory through the spread of The Gospel under persecution from the government, and most of the great revivals throughout the history of Christianity occurred during times of persecution; however, I am still praying for God to reveal Himself to the leaders of Malaysia, as well as other oppressive governments around the world.
It was difficult feeling powerless, wanting to be able to meet with the Prime Minister of Malaysia, yet obviously in no position worthy of taking up his time. I pray and hope that one day, that will change.
Malaysia was good to me. I am so thankful that the Lord re-routed my squad and we were sent there for month 9.
I spent the first half of the month in Penang, where we raised money for a local hospital for people who are unable to afford heart surgeries, as well as spent time evangelizing and ministering to the local homeless. It was incredible how the time with the homeless changed my perspective on the entire city, as I was introduced to the spots the homeless generally would gather at night, and instead of seeing a certain place in the city as a popular tourist destination, I saw it as the place the man I had met the night before would go to ask for food.
I met one homeless man in particular, and he shared with me his story. I couldn’t understand every word he said, but as he shared, the tears began to well up in his eyes, and mine as well, as the hurt and pain he had experienced was all too evident. He allowed me to pray for him (huge victory as evangelism in Malaysia is very touchy, as legally you are not allowed to convert, or ask anyone to convert), and then I just held him for a while. My hand has never been squeezed so tightly before. The man was so desperate for some love. Just a little bit of love to be shown his way.
I was personally convicted immediately afterwards. So much time is spent concentrating on giving love to orphans and children, which is of course awesome! But we cannot forget the older man or woman who is homeless as well, they need just as much, if not more, love.
Love is something that the Lord has been teaching me a lot about this year. How to love others at every moment of the day, how to love others who you really don’t want to love at all, and just the overall importance of offering someone love. And it is HARD. Love is hard. I won’t go into all 1 Corinthians 13, but it is tough to truly love someone.
Every one on this earth wants and needs love. Every one. No matter age, socioeconomic class, race, gender, anything. Every time we interact with someone we have a choice, a choice to choose to love them through the grace and strength of Christ, drawing on the love He has given us, or choose not to.
My prayer is that as I go about the moments of each day, I will always choose love.
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